When I first began painting at home, I came to realize how lonely the work would be. The house was quiet. No one to talk to which was the way it needed to be if I were to get anything accomplished. I love talking to other people. Just the other day I complimented my son for being so patient with me while I visited on and on with people I kept running into while we were out and about. He said he's learned to just focus on how nice it feels when we finally get in the car and back home.
I thought I was lonely while I worked at home......but I am not. "Tucked away"......"Hidden"........those might be the words to use instead. Different adjectives bring new meaning to the same reality, and we act often according to the expression of our words. Lonely?.....no. Time away......yes! Work needs to be done........and not only by my hands but most importantly by the hand of my Father.
I am ever before him a constant work in progress. We need to be alone.
I in Him, and He in me.
Are you feeling alone? Maybe you are instead "tucked away" or "hidden" for a season for the Master to do something special with you. He is Creator always. Let the season be if that is His desire and embrace it as He molds and shapes you. He wants to tell you about mysteries and treasures. Eat the "daily bread" for He has a word just for you this day. Let it be you in Him, and He in you.
"But the way of Jesus is the way of hiddenness, powerlessness, and littleness.
It does not seem a very appealing way.
Yet when I enter into true deep communion with Jesus
I will find that it is this small way that links to real peace and joy."
- Henri Nouwen
"For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you also will appear with him in glory." Colossians 3:3
"But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed. " Luke 5:16
"To them God has chosen to make known among the Gentiles the glorious riches of this mystery, which is Christ in you, the hope of glory." Colossians 1:27
Truth
{Here is the church}
{Here is the steeple}
{Open the doors, here's all the people!}
We teach this little gimmick to children for them to learn "church" is not a building.......it is "people". People hooked together, leaning on each other, working together and moving in active and dynamic ways.
It represents a truth.
Take one out of the mix, and it doesn't make sense.....it looks jumbled.....half-done.
Try to just show one, and it is awkward, uncomfortable.......ugly.
I thought I could start something, and just be "one".......but there is not truth in something like that working right. It was not intended to be that way.
One of the surprises in my journey has been the moments God has brought someone I needed along side me at just the right moment. Each time I embraced them.......one created by God for a purpose...."ah-hah" moments would follow. Wisdom, clarity, vision, encouragement, knowledge, functionality.....all gifts coming from the Lord through them.
I needed them. They needed me too. We latch arms, strength is found, and we are all able to move forward in fullness in the different ventures/dreams the Lord has given each of us. Yes, Lord, this is your plan.
There are changes coming to this site, and I am so excited about it!
Yes, I've latched arms with someone who knows much about things I don't.... for, you see, I'm technically challenged. I tried to figure that stuff out on my own.......bought books intended "for Dummies" only to learn I was a bigger dummy than I thought. I was frustrated, but that was used to teach me to be open to a gift coming my way.
A new design and web address is a part of this mix. The changes will be communicated to you when time. I tell you all this to say clearly that none of what I am doing or ever will do in the future is on my own. It starts with my face to the ground saying "What? Lord! How? Lord!".
And He reveals Himself once again at His conductor's stand.
He moves and directs His orchestra.....telling each piece when they are to play as they watch for Him...... and the music plays in His melody.......just as He had written long ago.
And it works. Not only does it just "work"........it is beautiful.
"There are different kinds of gifts, but the same Spirit. There are different kinds of service, but the same Lord. There are different kinds of working, but the same God works all of them in all men." 1 Corinthians 12:4
"The body is a unit, though it is made up of many parts; and though all its parts are many, they form one body.......But in fact God has arranged the parts in the body, every one of them, just as he wanted them to be." 1 Corinthians 12:12 and 18
Truth
I couldn't wait to get out to the track this morning.
It has become quite the sacred place to me. Every morning I've been out there by myself able to say and do whatever I feel. Yesterday, I literally walked around in thick fog not able to see from one end of the track to the other. Totally secluded. It was great. This morning I had a list in my mind of everything I wanted to say as loud as I could to the Lord. The track.........I would get the kids to school and then head to the track. Yes, it would be good.
I pulled into the parking lot and was met with several other people getting out of their cars to head to the track too.
What are they doing here??!! They are never here. Don't they know the weather is changing tomorrow and they are not doing themselves any good to start this today. They need to leave. Ugh. Irritation.
So "Plan B" was put into place as I grabbed my ipod and plugged my ears with the earphones. I would just have to listen instead.
And the music played........
"Our God is greater, Our God is stronger....God you are higher than any other.......Our God is healer....Awesome in power.....Our God, Our God." (Chris Tomlin)
"Take my moments and my days, let each breath that I take be ever holy for you, O God. Here I stand arms open wide.........I am Yours and You are mine. ......My whole life is yours, surrendered to your name....and forever I will pray 'Have Your Way.'" (Hillsong United)
"Here at your feet...I lay this day down, not in my strength, but in yours I've found, All I need......You're all I need......Jesus! Jesus! At your feet. Oh!.... to dwell and never leave......there is nowhere else for me.......because I am free......all I need......I find peace.....here at your feet." (Casting Crowns)
Oh, Lord.......that is who you are. And You are mine!!! Oh, Lord.......so great a gift. So great.
The others left the track, and I was alone again.
And I felt the Lord saying to me, "Now, what were you going to say to me before you were interrupted?"
I couldn't speak.
Awe-struck.......once again.......and everything falling back into right place.
"Awe ignites joy because it makes us bend the knee........and we are in deepest happiness in the posture of grateful worship." Ann Voskamp, One Thousand Gifts
All pictures taken by my 10 year old son.
May today you be awe-struck as a child seeing the beauty of the Lord which is all around you. All is new........All is glory. May that come before you likewise can speak.
Day and night they never stop saying: "Holy, holy, holy is the Lord God Almighty, who was, and is, and is to come." Revelation 4:8
"Then I heard every creature in heaven and on earth and under the earth and on the sea, and all that is in them singing: 'To Him who sits on the throne and to the Lamb....be praise and honor and glory and power, forever and ever!'" Revelation 5:13
Truth
This morning I dropped the kids off at school and then headed to the football field to walk. It had rained earlier and the air was fresh. I was the only one at the field or even nearby. The perfect gift to me at the moment.
The football field......usually the place of work, wrestling, blocking, pushing, grunting, running, falls, loses, victory, and celebration. What emotion does not show on that field? But this morning, it was quiet.......perfectly still. It was just me and my God. I walked the track and was able to speak as loud as I wanted to speak and say verbally out loud whatever I needed to. I listened....and I waited too.
A holy moment indeed.
My track time ended and in the quiet and stillness started reflecting on the sports complex. This place is such a part of our lives now, but there will be a time when it won't be. Life will move on. At that time, I picture us returning to this spot and declaring it sacred not because of its striking beauty for it is not........but for what has been worked out on that field. My sons practice at the field everyday after school, and it is where the skill is played out at game time in a quest to be victorious. There they have learned to work with coaches and teammates.......some of the other people in their lives. Some of the march to manhood has occurred here. Many a prayer has been offered up on that field both in practice and in games. Just the other day, our oldest son laughingly took John and me to the edge of the practice field and declared that we should have a moment of silence to reflect on it. They work hard there. I see it on their faces and on their bodies everyday when they come home. It is sweat, blood, bruises,..........and many times smiles.
A sacred place. Not always a beautiful place..........but a wrestling and a working-it-out place. A growing place. A prayful place.
I think about our home. It is safe.......comfortable.......a place that pulls us all together. We've had many fun and love filled times in our home. I smile thinking about them all. And yet, to say our home has been nothing but bliss would not be truth.......not at all. In this home, five people are living together, trying to mature, learn, process, work, etc. While we love each other immensely, it has also been the spot where we've learned that we are not each other's "One and Only". Only the true One is meant to hold that place. We've learned this in our home, and now I realize that because of that, it is a sacred place. Bliss does not make the sacred. The Lord at work does.
The kid's school, John's office, our church, our present small town community. We've pressed in to God in these places. There has been much to wrestling and work out. Each are sacred places.
And for these, I am thankful.......not for their beauty........but in these places we've lived life and have learned how much we need the Lord. He is "Immanuel".....God with us......and the places He walks with us are sacred.
"The Lord God is my strength, and He has made my feet like hinds' feet, and makes me walk on my high places." Habakkuk 3:19
"Bless the Lord, all you works of His, In all places of His dominion; Bless the Lord, O my soul!" Psalm 103:22
Truth
My middle son is 13, but not for long. Another birthday celebration is actually just days away. 13......it has been a good year for him......a transitional year. Boyhood is slowly diminishing as he marchs toward manhood.
The 13th birthday in our house is a big one. We have decided to celebrate the 13th birthday by John and I getting away with just the birthday boy, having some fun, but really focus on talking about becoming a man. This is an idea that came to us through some mentors and also through the book Raising A Modern-Day Knight by Robert Lewis. The book shares and instructs about having a series of "ceremonies" to mark the passages in a boy's life. The start of adolescence is the first ceremony.
In preparing for the trip, we made our son a book outlining the "Code of Conduct" otherwise known as the ten Biblical ideals for Manhood (taken from the book by Robert Lewis mentioned above). They are as follows:
Family (grandparents, aunts, and uncles) was asked to write our son a letter talking specifically to him about one of the above ideals. They shared stories, reiterated importance, encouraged by revealing what they were currently seeing in him, etc. The letters were also included in the book given to our son. While on our weekend trip, we periodically stopped what we were doing, opened his book, discussed a trait, and gave him the letters from his family.
Manhood. We don't want to rush things, but our son is on this natural path. We told our son we want him to enjoy his childhood and youth for a long time......that we weren't expecting him to immediately act like a man. The progression is happening though, and we wanted to plant some things deep into him at the beginning and in a way he'll never forget. We spent a lot of time saying, "Son, you have it in you. You can most definitely do this. You are already walking this direction. You are becoming a man of God. The Lord must be first. God will be the one to guide you in all."
How fun it is to speak truth into the lives of our children! We have friends who have chosen different birthdays and different ways to speak the same message into their sons. It can be done a number of ways. I love hearing all the ideas. The main thing is getting their attention, speaking the truth clearly, and giving them a blessing that they'll never forget. This is the truly fun and delightful part of parenting.
"Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it." Proverbs 22:6
Truth
October 5th? Can that really be right? Didn't school just start maybe last week? It hasn't really been seven weeks, could it be? Where is the time going?! Now we are at the beginning of another month.......a beautiful, glorious, colorful month. Oh, October........please be slow!
But how?
I sit in the stands many times a week and watch over and over the plays of the team. The ball is set in motion, and it causes quite a stirring. The plays commence over and over again to move the ball down the field. I relate. Isn't that the way the beginning of a week feels? Time is put into motion and then I move down the "field": Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday..........Oh!, is it Sunday again already?! I pray I am running my "plays" right.....making the most of time.
Oh, October........slow down. Let the hamster wheel rest......if for but a moment. These times I'm in........they are good. Each moment is a gift, and I know each is sacred. I want to hold these moments.....freeze them to have time to grasp them.
This week I was given a checklist........but one I grabbed willingly. A Fall Photo Checklist that can be downloaded here. I read through the list........a list of moments really: a tree of fall leaves, a child's artwork, view out the front door, closeup of a football, etc. I think about stopping the hamster wheel....camera in hand.... to take these pictures, and I view it like stopping and smelling the roses.
Oh, October........go slow. Let me "smell", "taste"and "see" the Giver of you
"...let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptably with reverence and awe...." Hebrews 12:28
"Teach me to number my days aright, that we may gain a heart of wisdom." Psalm 90:12
Truth
It was so exciting watching him take those first steps. We cheered and encouraged any way we could with each new step.
Today, he is fully capable of walking across the room with ease. (Is this a good time to interject that this boy ran 40 yards to score a touchdown last weekend? Just sayin'.) It is not necessary any longer for me to get in front of him and cheer "Come on! Come on! That's how you do it! You can make it!" every time he takes a step. He knows how. He just needs to put it into practice.
I actually know how to walk myself. I'm not just speaking physically now, but referring to my walk with the Lord. The Lord has shown himself faithful to me time and time again. He has nurtured, encouraged, and taught me and continues to do so as my Father.
As life continues to move forward, I am taking new steps in my journey. I want to see my Father physically in front of me saying, "Come on! Come on! You can do it! That's right! You can make it". I know he does say those things for I have felt it at other times, but this time I feel Him saying to me, "You know how to do this, now walk!".
My faith......that is what He is talking about. I know truth in my head and heart yet my eyes don't see the tangible. Should I walk?
God is a nurturer......don't get me wrong. His eyes are searching for those who need strengthening (2 Chronicles 16:9). But He is also a Father who looks at His child who confesses belief and expects faith and trust.
It is black or white.
Am I going to trust Him or not?
Do I believe Him or not?
Is His Word true or not?
"Yes, Lord!", I say.
"Then, WALK!"
"And this is love; that we walk in obedience to his commands. As you have heard from the beginning, his command is that you walk in love." 2 John 6.
"I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life." -Jesus John 8:12
Truth
The Lesson:
The Teacher: My Mother
My mother has taken art classes weekly for years and has taught me much about painting and colors. The day she shared this lesson though, we weren't talking about art. She was commenting on life.
Today, I pray that you will know that you are a work of the Lord. The Lord is "painting" your life and has a purpose......even in your shadows. He can use them to bring a richness and depth to your colors. His light will pop against these shadows making you a beautiful display of His glory. The tedious work has already been done through Christ's sacrifice on the cross. His love is warm and thick. This "painting" that you are becoming will only make sense though if others can tell He is your Light.
"I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life." - Jesus John 8:12
"For God, who said, 'Let light shine out of darkness,' made his light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Christ." 2 Corinthians 4:6
"....being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus." Philippians 1:6
Truth
Twice in our married lives, John and I have been without work and without our own home. The first time happened after the birth of our first son and the second time happened when we were having our second son. Not the timing I would have picked. We felt God's hand leading both times, and yet His way was very different than ours. Our parents took us in and cared for us during these seasons. It was a time of living just day to day when we had no idea what was ahead.
With no income coming in, everything became very basic. Just a trip to Walmart to get something we needed.......not a want, but a NEED.......became such a treat. I remember speaking to myself many days saying, "THIS day we will be OK. TODAY we will have a place to stay, we will have food to eat, we have clothes to wear, and we will have a bed to sleep in tonight. We are just fine." The basics were covered......maybe differently than I once imagined.......but they were covered, and I was more than OK. "Greatly blessed" is actually the term to use.
I treasure those seasons of my life now. Not only were they sweet times with our parents, they taught me to see things differently. While our current living situation has changed, there is always the question of what the future holds. That part has never changed. How easy it is to want to run ahead worrying wondering about what lays ahead. It seems like there is always something in front of us we just can't figure out on our own, and yet if God's desire is for us to live in trust of Him, would He really lead us in a life where we could clearly figure everything out ourselves?
I hear God return me to the basics. "Focus only on THIS day," He says to me. "THIS day are you living with me? THIS day are you taking and eating the 'food' I give you to feed and sustain your mind, body, and soul? THIS day, what is the garment you are wearing? Is it the one of humility, praise, and thankfulness? THIS day are you resting in ME? Then, you will be OK......actually, you'll be greatly blessed."
"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body; what you will wear. Life is more than food, and the body more than clothes..........(v. 31) your Father knows that you need them. But seek his kingdom, and these things will be given to you as well." Luke 12:22-31
"Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen!" Ephesians 3:20
Truth
I'm just a gal slinging her paintbrush and sword all at the same time.
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